People who arrive prepared get more from a first consultation. That’s not a criticism of anyone who doesn’t, it’s just how these meetings work. An attorney who spends forty minutes reconstructing what your parents own is an attorney who isn’t spending that time thinking about what your parents need.
The most useful thing to bring is a list of assets. Bank accounts, investment accounts, retirement accounts, real estate. Approximate values are fine. The point is completeness, not precision. If there’s a business interest, insurance policy, or anything held in trust already, include that too. Retirement accounts and life insurance policies deserve particular attention because they pass by beneficiary designation, not through a will, and those designations may not reflect what your parents actually want at this point in their lives.
Alongside the asset list, bring any documents that already exist. A will drafted ten years ago. A power of attorney from a previous attorney. Any healthcare directive that’s been signed. These may need updating, but the attorney needs to see them to understand what they’re working with and where the gaps are.
Bring the family picture. Names and ages of children, step-children, and grandchildren. Any situations worth flagging: a child with special needs, an estrangement, a second marriage, a beneficiary who has had financial difficulties. You don’t need to present this as a problem. The attorney will know what questions to ask once they understand the structure.
For aging parents specifically, the health picture matters. Current diagnoses, level of independence, likely care trajectory. If there’s any concern about cognitive decline, say so at the outset. It shapes what the attorney will prioritise and how quickly they’ll want to move. In situations where capacity is uncertain, timing may matter more than any other factor.
Prepare your parents, not just the documents. Before the meeting, it helps if they’ve thought about a few things: who do they trust to make decisions on their behalf, and who absolutely not? How do they feel about life support, resuscitation, and long-term institutional care? What would they want in a worst-case scenario? These conversations are easier at home before they’re happening in a lawyer’s office for the first time.
One thing that often surprises families: getting organised before an attorney meeting regularly surfaces things that need to be dealt with anyway. An account no one knew existed. A beneficiary designation that was never updated after a divorce. A life insurance policy that lapsed. Preparation is useful in its own right, not just as a courtesy to the attorney.